Phys Ed Teachers Triumph in Faculty Dodgeball

Photos by Hannah Kahn

By Hannah Kahn

Nothing reminds one that teachers are real people like seeing them in gym clothes. Thursday’s Student-Council event was consequently very eye-opening, as Mamaroneck High School students filled the Palmer Gym to cheer on their teachers in a good old-fashioned game of dodgeball.

The teams, Science, Math, English, Physical Education, Special Ed, Social Studies, Counseling and World Language, all came clad in their respective colors and matching kitschy accessories. The uniforms were clearly a priority for some teams more than others. The English Department, also known as “The Punctuators,” wore cus- tomized red shirts, each teacher touting a different punctuation mark emblazoned on his or her back. The Science Team, which referred to itself as “The Dominant Alleles,” showed up in neon green tees decorated with spray-painted Punnett squares.

While their attention to detail was impeccable apparel-wise, it did not hold up on the courts. The English and Science teams were among the first to fall out of the running, along with World Language, Counseling, and Social Studies.

Every game was action-packed and full of surprises. Highlights included Ms. Ammerata’s tumble during Social Studies’ second round (and Ms. Scudder’s helping hand) and Chemistry teacher Mr. Mattis’s parkour-like dives for the ball. The most shocking moment was the return of Mr. Zervas, former Mamaroneck High School math teacher, who left his teaching position at the school this past fall. Even teachers were surprised to see Zervas, who made a grand entrance by running out from the audience, removing a hoodie and glasses as the crowd went wild.
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The semifinal consisted of Math (“The Absolute Ballers”) and Special Education, with Special Ed coming out on top to defeat the reigning champs. This left for a heated final round, Special Education versus Physical Education. After Student-Council President Ben Morris ’16 set up the three orange orbs on the center axis of the gym one last time, the final game begin. In a blazing blur of black and neon yellow, the teachers fought hard until the last ball hit the Special Ed team. To no one’s surprise, the Gym teachers won the dodgeball tournament.

Mr. Derby is the PACE music teacher, but with his fiery throw, he fit right in with the Gym teachers. When asked how it felt to be on the winning team, Derby replied, “Oh my god, it’s amazing, I—” before he was cut off by Mr. Shansky, who shooed away the eager paparazzi and press on behalf of his friend. Instead of heading to Disney World after the Super Bowl-esque win, Derby has decided to celebrate at the Brooklyn Academy of Music. But before that, he carried his trophy around the gym, high-fiving ecstatic fans in a victory lap he will undoubtedly never forget.

 

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