“Advice you can’t refuse”
Recently, I was introduced to a friend of a friend whom I hit it off with, and after spending sometime together he offered me some gum. I tried some, and it was pretty good. Turns out it’s from Chinatown and easy to get. This guy sees that I liked it so now he keeps driving back and forth to Chinatown to buy me cases of it. How do I tell him to stop?
Dear Bob Sacamano,
It seems that you are in a tough position here; you don’t want to hurt his feelings, but at the same time, the gum is getting pretty excessive. My advice to you is to be completely honest with him. Tell him you really appreciate his buying the gum for you, but that it is unnecessary. Tell him that if he happens to be in Chinatown picking up gum, you’d be happy to take a piece, but there is no sense in going all the way to Chinatown just to buy you cases of gum. I’m sure he will understand and will be grateful for your honesty.
If your friend follows up by saying, “It’s really not a problem. I’m happy to do it,” you should be firm with him. Tell him you don’t love the gum that much, and as much as you appreciate his efforts, it is not something he should be spending his time doing. Make it clear that you are thankful for his dedication, but you don’t necessarily want him to continue with it. In any situation, honesty will always bring you the greatest results, even if it seems like the hardest thing to do. It will definitely pay off in the long run.
P.S. If all else fails, ask Newman.